Agnus Dei
by These Lonely Skies
Summary: The sins of her world don't wash easily from Ellie's skin, no matter how hard she tries to hide them under small town pleasantry. They stain and paint a target on her back. Dean and Cas are in purgatory. Sam's in denial. And Ellie is in limbo.
1. Chapter 1

_**Hey guys! Okay so I know I'm totally tied up in Gravity at the moment but I've been tossing this headcanon around for about a year with a friend of mine and she finally convinced me to give it a go. This isn't going to be priority update but I find I work better when I focus on two things so I can alternate them, so hopefully this all works out splendidly.**_

_**Parallels you may notice: Both of the main characters in Gravity and Agnus Dei are called Eleanor. They are completely different and this will become apparent the more you read, it just happened to be a name that my friend liked and one that really fit the character when I started writing her. **_

_**Please review and let me know if you'd like more! I'm more likely to focus on this fic if I know there's some genuine interest in it.**_

***.*.***

_Agnus Dei, qui tollis peccata mundi, miserere nobis._  
><em>Agnus Dei, qui tollis peccata mundi, miserere nobis.<em>  
><em>Agnus Dei, qui tollis peccata mundi, dona nobis pacem.<em>

_Lamb of God, you who take away the sins of the world, have mercy upon us._

_Lamb of God, you who take away the sins of the world, have mercy upon us._

_Lamb of God, you who take away the sins of the world, grant us peace._

_-Roman Rite Mass, based on Syrian chanting custom._

_*.*.*_

**CHAPTER ONE**

**La Push, present day.**

Ellie could feel eyes on her when she walked into the diner. She didn't react to it. It was normal in podunk little towns like this. If her brothers were with her, they'd assume that they were just tourists passing through. She'd either be assumed as one of their girlfriends, or they'd be assumed to be dating each other. People never seemed to come to the conclusion they were siblings. She didn't blame them. There was little family resemblance, even between Sam and Dean, who had at least shared both their parents. She'd only had John to make her part of the Winchester gene pool. It was a joke she and Adam had shared; part of the Winchester club, but not quite Winchester enough for it to matter.

It was never a particularly funny joke.

_And now you got no one, _she reminded herself as she sat down in a booth and scanned the menu. A waitress came around after a few minutes.

"Hey sweetie, can I getcha something?"

She was a short woman, middle aged, dark threaded with silver and tied back. Her face didn't look too old, but her hands were a different story. They were battered and old. Her nametag said _Annette._

Ellie took all this in as she returned the waitress' friendly smile. "I'll have the pie, thanks. And whatever coffee you got brewin' right now'd be real nice."

"Coming right up. You not waiting on anyone?"

Girls travelling by themselves were always suspicious, especially if they were polite. People started assuming she was running from a dangerous boyfriend, or maybe even her daddy. She'd been asked more than once, even slipped numbers for Women's Refuge a few times. It was nice but it didn't help none. She wasn't running from anyone who would chase her. No human, anyway. She still wasn't too sure where she stood on the supernatural hit list.

"Naw," she said. "I'm good. Can I get cream with the pie please?"

"Sure thing."

Ellie forced herself to relax instead of sweeping the restaurant. She wanted to look like she was stopping in for some food, not casing the damn joint. If she looked twitchy they'd get all sympathetic. Poor little girl running from home.

Poor little girl hadn't had a home to run from since she was sixteen years old. Not unless you counted a black Impala, which she did, but most other people didn't.

"Is there a motel 'round here?" Ellie asked Annette when the waitress returned with her coffee and pie. "I'm lookin' to stay a while."

"There's a few nice ones in Forks," Annette said. "Town a few miles back, you probably passed through it on your way."

"Nothin' here?"

"There's some cabins. Just outta town. Nothing big."

"I ain't big myself." Ellie smiled at her pleasantly, just an innocent slow-talking girl from outta town.

"Alright." Annette produced a pen from her apron and pulled a napkin over, bending down to draw a crude map. "It's fairly easy to get there, but you're pretty much right in the woods, so be careful. We got some big wildlife around here."

"I will be. Thank you, ma'am." Ellie tucked the napkin into the breast pocket of her shirt and smiled real big again.

Annette seemed reassured and moved away with a _you're welcome, sweetie. _

The pie was real good. Dean woulda loved it.

_Dean's in Purgatory, _she reminded herself crossly. _Don't you go thinkin' about that. _

She ate every bite and bought another one to go, feeling kinda lonely. She'd been travelling by Greyhound from main cities, but she'd stolen a little old Mazda that Dean would've hated on sight when she was in Seattle. It was beat up and none too pretty, an ugly green that got uglier the more you looked at the thing, but it had an iPod dock and it ran on the smell of an oily rag so she wasn't complaining too much.

She did miss having a real car though. Hopefully Sam was taking good care of Dean's baby.

She drove out carefully, easing the little ugly thing around potholes that would have been hell on the teeny tiny tyres. The woods closed in and swallowed the houses whole after a few miles. She had to check Annette's map to make sure she was still on the right track.

The turn off was a gravel road that she jolted over with a wince and a few words that would have made her old pastor blush. She was seriously doubting Annette's credibility when she finally rounded the last corner and found a big old house with faded yellow shutters. Behind it, the driveway continued. She assumed that whoever owned the cabins lived here.

Parking up beside the house, she bounded up the steps and knocked. Habit made her sniff quickly for sulfur, and had her eyes darting 'round for unusual plants or signs of anything untoward.

So far, so good. She patted the hex bag in her jeans for luck as she waited.

The door opened and a grumpy-looking man was glaring down at her.

"Can I help ya?" he demanded in a way that let her know he was really hoping he couldn't.

"Yessir. I heard from a woman named Annette that there was cabins out this way for rent," she said brightly. "I'd like one, please."

He grunted. "For how long?"

"A week." She could always bail out early if she had to.

"Fine." He rummaged behind the door and held out a key. "A hundred. If you leave early you can get some back."

Frowning at his attitude, Ellie pulled out her wallet and handed over a few bills. "That oughta do it."

He pocketed them. "I don't do the cooking, there's all the facilities there. No cable. And if you break anything, you bought it, so don't break nothing. Got it?"

She kind of wanted to smack the geezer. "Yessir." Ellie held her hand out for the key.

"Cabin number two," he sniffed as he let it drop into her hand. "You don't leave before I check for damages."

"I got it." Ellie turned and walked away before she could be berated any more. "Small things, Eleanor, small minds," she muttered to herself as she got back into the car and eased it around the house and around another corner. The cabins came into view, each with its own little driveway and parked area. They were podunk little things but they were perfect for what she wanted. No one would bother her here. Probably not even that cranky owner.

She parked up and grabbed her worn duffel bag, slinging it over her shoulder. The cabins looked to be in better shape than the actual house, which had peeling paint. This was all wood, stained dark, with a dark green tin roof. It almost blended in with the woods behind it. She looked at her ugly car and wished it was the same muted green, but it'd do. No one was gonna report a car like that stolen.

The interior was dusty and clearly hadn't been used for a while. Ellie sneezed, then dropped her duffel bag and rummaged for the salt.

Never too early to set up her perimeter.

*.*.*

**Louisiana,**

**2007.**

Sam and Dean found Ellie when she was sixteen. She'd already been on her own for a year. Her momma had been killed by monsters who were messing around in town. Ellie had shot the one that came after her with her daddy's gun and gone to ground. John had left the gun for a reason, apparently. Whatever had killed her momma hadn't taken the bullet like a man woulda. It was fast and she had to shoot a lot to get it down. She didn't have her momma's phone and her dad's number wasn't on speed dial on hers, so she tried looking him up, but no John Winchester was her John Winchester. She left town with some cash from the emergency card her mom had given her, before it could be cancelled, on a Greyhound.

She went to a city, because it made sense to go to a place with a lotta people, and she squatted in an empty building with some questionable people and kept her daddy's gun close. She got a job with some even more questionable people. It was rough, but she had to survive somehow. They left her alone for the most part when she wasn't running their drugs around. She was scrawny and scrappy and she knew how to fight. She'd once had a whole shelf of trophies and medals to prove it. But that was before.

She saved her bullets. She had a few boxes of them in her duffel but that wouldn't last long if she used them all.

Eventually she moved into a crappy apartment with a user, one of the other runners who had gotten sucked into the life. She padlocked her door inside when she was home and outside when she left. Her window was boarded up, had been when she moved in, so that was okay.

One day her disgusting roomie was all of a sudden sober. Ellie didn't trust it. She tucked her gun into her waistband and stuffed her remaining cash - it was always cash with the dealers - into her bra.

She almost made it to the door.

Turned out that whatever it was she had shot had tracked her down after all this time, and it was pissed. She was knocked out. When she woke up she wasn't even in the city anymore. She was on her way to God-knew-where in a fancy car and her assailant was wearing a different face yet again. Her feet were tied and her door was kiddy-locked. The monster warned her not to try and crash them, because it would survive and she wouldn't.

They were going to meet up with others. And then they were gonna take her somewhere and sell her off. That was all she got before it got annoyed at her questions and smacked her across the face with the meaty paw of the man it had turned into.

She shut up after that.

They ended up in a motel, of all places. She had expected something more sinister. Apparently monsters needed sleep too. She was tied to a chair and left, dehydrated and weak from not eating for possibly several days, while two of them went out for food and one of them watched.

"Please lemme go," she had begged. She usually had more pride but she was sixteen and scared and she didn't want to be sold off.

It had told her to shut up, _little bitch, _and gone back to watching out the window.

Then it happened.

She was weak by this point and couldn't really follow what was going on exactly, but the windows shattered and guns fired and it was dead on the floor with two men pointing guns at it. The tall man stared at her with wide eyes while the other one moved around the room, checking the perimeter.

"Dean," he hissed.

The shorter one - Dean - lowered his gun and walked towards her. She cringed back from him, because what if they were going to sell her too?

Water hit her face unexpectedly, making her splutter, and then before she could recover he had pulled a knife on her and slashed her arm. She cried out in shock.

"She's clean," he said to the other one. He turned back to her. "Who are you?"

She couldn't answer with her teeth chattering in her mouth like that.

"I asked you a question!" he snarled, advancing on her again.

"Dean-" the tall one warned.

"_Stay the hell away from me!" _Ellie tried to scream, but her throat was so dry that it came out all hoarse and strangled. She felt herself start to cry, though how she had any water left in her body was beyond her.

He clenched his jaw and turned away, directing the other one towards her with a jerk of his head.

This one approached slowly, hands up peacably. "You're Ellie, right? I'm Sam. I'm gonna get you out of here. I'm going to come around behind you and cut your hands loose, but I need you to stay calm, because if you try to run they might catch you again before we get them. Can you do that for me?"

Ellie nodded, still trembling and with her instincts screaming that letting another man with a knife near her right now was _VERY BAD. _

"Sorry about Dean," he said in the same calm voice as he moved behind her. She felt tugging on the ropes around her wrists. "We had to check that you were… well, you."

The pressure eased and her wrists were free. She stifled a groan as the blood flowed back into them, gingerly bringing them around into her lap so she could try and massage them with bloodless fingers.

Sam got to work on her ankles.

"How many of them are there?" Dean demanded.

"T-three," she managed. "Or two n-now I guess."

"How long ago did they leave?"

She sniffed and glared at him. "I didn't exactly h-have a damn _timer."_

"_Dean," _Sam said again warningly as he cut through the last of her bonds. He unfolded himself and reached toward her unexpectedly, making her flinch again, but he was just looking at the cut Dean had made on her arm. "It's not deep. Here." He turned and ripped a strip off one of the cheap bed sheets, tying it neatly around her arm.

"Don't baby her," Dean snapped.

"Don't be such a dick," Sam responded. "I know you're not happy about this, but you have to deal with it."

"I am!"

"Happy about what?" Ellie asked, lead settling in her stomach as she awaited some terrible answer.

"Nothing," Dean replied shortly. "We'll explain when we're on the road, okay?"

She frowned. "You're taking me with you?"

"We're taking you someplace safe," Sam explained. "We know about your mom. You don't have anywhere to go, right?"

Ellie stared at him. "How the hell do you know about my mom? How do you know who I am? _Who are you people?" _

"We're-" Sam started to say, but he was interrupted by Dean calling his name and the door slamming open, announcing the arrival of the remaining monsters.

She couldn't look away as Dean and Sam shot them down. The monsters looked disturbingly human as they fell to the ground, still in the skins they had stolen.

"Let's move before the cops get here," Dean commanded. He looked at her almost reluctantly. "Can you walk?"

Ellie stood up shakily and took a step, almost falling before Sam caught her and slung her arm around his shoulders.

"Thanks," she muttered.

He helped her across the tiny lot to where a black Impala was sitting, settling her in the back before climbing into the passenger seat himself. Dean, unsurprisingly, was the driver as they peeled out of the lot like it was catching fire.

"What's goin' on?" Ellie demanded. "Are you and your boyfriend just some kind of weird vigilantes or what?"

Dean groaned. "For Christ's sake, we're not dating, we're _brothers."_

"Actually," Sam began.

"Sammy," Dean warned.

Sam gave him a look and turned to her to continue. "We're… kind of… _your _brothers."

She gaped at him. "I'll be honest," she said, "That's not where I saw this headin' when you said _actually_. I don't have brothers. I don't have _siblings._"

"Well, now you do." Sam shrugged. "John Winchester's your dad, right?"

"We don't _know _that for sure," Dean interjected.

Ellie frowned. "Well yeah, he's my dad. He ain't around much though."

"He was our dad too."

"Was?"

Sam looked away.

Dean smiled mockingly at her in the rear view mirror. "Welcome to the family, sweetheart. Life expectancy is low."


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER TWO**

**La Push, present day.**

When she woke up, she went jogging. There were trails towards the cliffs but she needed to go to town, so she headed for the road instead. She left her iPod at home because years of being snuck up on tended to make a person paranoid about compromising their hearing in lonesome places.

The trees were beautiful, but like anything, they just made her suspicious. What was hiding in them? What was gonna jump down and attack some innocent person?

Ellie was fast. She wasn't faster than Sam, but Sam was freakishly tall and had a much bigger stride than she did. She was certainly faster than Dean. Again, not a fair comparison, since the only exercise Dean got these days was small time hunting between supernatural shitfests. At least when he was having meaningless sex all the time he was getting some cardio in.

Crap. She'd thought of Dean like he was just around the corner again.

_He's gone. Him and Cas both. Ain't no coming back from Purgatory._

He just had such a bad habit of coming back. They both did. It felt strange that this was the one place they weren't getting out of.

She ran into the town proper, past the diner she'd gone to yesterday, and finally slowed in front of the grocery store. She was sweating more than she usually would, but then she had pushed herself faster than she normally would. It felt good to stretch out muscles that had been useless for days while she travelled by bus and car.

The store was small and needed love. The linoleum was peeling up in the corners of the aisles and one of the lights was out completely. Ellie picked up a basket and pushed the hair that had escaped her ponytail off her face as she wandered down the fruit and vegetable aisle. Sam would probably judge her for not looking for organic food. He was oddly conscientious about that stuff considering the lifespan of your average hunter.

She picked up some spinach and broccoli in his honour.

She had just started contemplating what kind of meat to buy when the back of her neck prickled and she knew she was being watched. She checked her phone like she had a list and wheeled around, scanning as if for a forgotten item.

There.

A woman with scars one side of her pretty face was looking at her. Beside her was a man who probably rivalled Sam in height and easily beat him in bulk, holding her hand and following her gaze. Ellie pretended not to notice and snatched up a packet of baby carrots before turning an sauntering back to where she had been.

They didn't look off. But demons never really did until they revealed themselves. She wished she'd brought the colt with her. That was one big son of a bitch. If he was a demon, she wasn't gonna be able to punch him and run.

They were either demons or rude. Either way she wanted to get outta there sharpish. She threw some steak into the basket and sped through the rest of her purchases so she could high tail it to the counter. She paid with cash and started back to her little cabin at a brisk pace. As she walked, she looked around at the houses. The ones that were clustered together were mostly cute little white picket things, but they got increasingly sprawly and weathered as she walked outta town towards the coast and the cabin. Roadside yards gave way to trees and dirt or gravel driveways winding up to invisible houses.

Her salt lines were undisturbed when she came back. She stepped over them carefully and locked the door behind her. She shoved the groceries in the little bar fridge under the counter and went into the teeny tiny bathroom to shower.

It didn't hit her until about midday today, just after she'd had lunch and cleaned up the sink. The loss. She pulled a half empty bottle of cheap, shitty whiskey out of her bag and sat at the little table. She lifted the bottle in a silent toast and took one good pull before she capped it again, grimacing at the taste. She really needed to get some better liquor.

She stayed at the table a while, letting her head tip back and her eyes slide shut as she thought about Dean and Cas and her momma and John and Jo and Ellen and Bobby, and even Sam, although he was just avoiding everyone and not actually dead. She didn't blame him since she was doing the same thing, but he _did _start it. He was probably still calling himself Winchester though.

Winchester was a hunting name. She didn't do that no more, and she was never full Winchester anyway. Besides, she kinda missed her momma's name. It sounded like innocence, something she hadn't been associated with for a long time.

*.*

She ended up going back into town around four, because she'd completely forgotten potatoes and they were one of the few things she knew with certainty she could cook without ruining after living on diner food for so long. She took her ugly car in. It looked like it was gonna rain. It was that time of year where you just didn't know what was gonna happen.

She got about halfway to the store when the thing started choking and the engine puttered out, barely giving her time to pull off the road before it died.

"Son of a God-damned _bitch_," she swore, thumping the dashboard. The sky was looking more ominous by the minute. She got out and popped the hood, assessing the damage. She didn't know all that much about the workings. She knew how to check and change oil, how to jumpstart, how to check the water, and some basic things to look at that needed attention every few weeks. Dean never let her work on the Impala but he did let her watch sometimes. She'd gotten some experience once they had to use a different car during the whole Leviathan mess.

It was clear no one had paid attention to this car in a good long while, and she cursed herself for not checking anything before now, because now it was beyond her limited expertise.

The sky opened up and it _poured. _

Ellie slammed the hood down, cussing and stomping around to the door. She flung herself in and switched the hazard lights on. She wondered if anyone even came out this way, or if she'd have to wait out the rain and walk to get help. She didn't know any local tow companies and her new phone unfortunately didn't have the internet.

An old pickup roared past, then stopped. It reversed just as fast until it was sitting beside her on the road. The window wound down, so she cranked hers down too. A big man leaned over to call out to her.

"You alright?"

"My damn car broke down," she called back, rain splatting her through the window. "Y'know any tow places 'round here?"

He shook his head. "Nearest one's in Forks. Hold on." He pulled ahead of her on the shoulder and got out. As he unfolded himself and walked towards her, Ellie's eyes widened. He was one big sucker, maybe bigger than the guy in the store. Certainly broader. What was in the damn water around here?

Ellie got out, subtly checking the comforting metal of her gun in her waistband. He was even bigger up close. She didn't think she'd ever met two people who could be taller than Sam, let alone that they would be in the same town.

"Jacob Black," he rumbled, holding out a large hand.

"Ellie Deyes. Nice to meetcha." She shook his hand firmly, looking him right in the eye like Ellie Winchester woulda. "You think you can get this hunk of crap workin'?"

The rain pounded harder as he glanced at it, seemingly unimpressed. "Well, I can try. Pop the hood, I'll see what's going on."

He whistled when he beheld the sight. "Damn, I'm surprised you got anywhere with this thing. You ever check this?"

"I bought it cheap in Seattle," she said over the rain, stretching the truth just a teensy bit. "Didn't get a chance."

He shook his head at the state of it. "Well, you aren't going anywhere without some serious work. You got anyone who can drive you around?"

She pushed her sopping hair out of her face impatiently. "Naw. I'm out here on my own. It was meant to be a roadtrip."

"And La Push featured as a destination?" Jacob said dubiously. "Whoever planned your trip ripped you off. And whoever sold you this car robbed you blind, it isn't worth the cost of gas to drive it."

She frowned at him. "I ain't stupid, I just needed a car and there wasn't a lotta choice. And who says I had a destination? Life's about the journey ain't it?"

"If you say so," he said easily, shrugging as he slammed the hood down again.

She glared at the stupid car, then sighed defeatedly. "You got the number for that tow company?"

"I can do one better. I'll give you a tow to my place. I've got a garage out back, I'll see if I can get it working."

Ellie blinked. "You serious?"

"I'm serious."

"Well, Jacob Black," she said, "I think you may just be my hero."

He laughed. "Make sure you tell my girlfriend you said that, she's been saying I need to do more grand gestures."

"She may not be meanin' for other girls," she said dryly.

"Maybe not, but it'll give her faith that its her turn soon." He grinned and it made him look a helluva lot younger. She realised with a start that maybe he wasn't as old as she had assumed. He didn't look all that much older than her when he smiled.

*.*.*

Jacob's girlfriend was a pretty little thing called Abby, who took one look at Ellie and started scolding him for not getting her outta the rain sooner. She was maybe two inches shorter than Ellie and moved like a dancer, holding her strength in her core.

"I'm giving her free mechanic work!" Jacob protested. "Trust me, if you saw her car you'd know how much of a saint I am!"

"Don't you go knockin' my car," Ellie said as she followed him up the porch steps. "It's got character."

He stopped in front of Abby and swooped down to kiss her sweet, rain soaked and all.

Ellie looked away uncomfortably. When she glanced back, Abby was smiling big and pushing his face away.

"You go dry off," she said. "You too, Ellie, I'll just get you a towel. Come on in, it's freezing out here in the wet."

Ellie emerged from the bathroom a short while later, dressed in some of Abby's tights and a sweater of Jacob's that went to her knees. Abby grabbed her wet clothes and put them in the dryer.

Ellie just hoped her gun didn't show in this outfit.

"Thanks for the hospitality," she said politely as she sat, under Abby's insistence, at the table in the kitchen.

"No problem." Abby slid into the chair across from her after setting the kettle to boil. "What's that accent I hear?"

"Louisiana. Born and bred." She may have laid her accent on a little thick when she said that, but in her experience folks ate that right up. Made them think they were talking to some swamp kid from the bayou. Inaccurate, but it mellowed people for some reason.

"I _love_ the way you talk. It's so nice to listen to."

Ellie shrugged. "My eldest brother always made fun of me for it. Called me Dolly Parton, even though I don't sound a damn thing like her. Southern's all just as well to him."

"Sounds the same to me too," Abby admitted sheepishly. "You have brothers? How come they didn't have the same accent?"

"Different mothers. I had three brothers, all older. Got one left now." She rapped on the wooden table for luck.

"Oh." Abby looked mortified to have asked, and possibly a little spooked at how casually Ellie was treating their deaths.

When your brothers died as often as Sam and Dean Winchester, you tended to get back on your feet quicker than normal people. Even if it was just because you couldn't reach the whiskey from bed.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to pry."

"S'okay." _That oughta stop some questions in their tracks._ Ellie leaned back in the chair and forced herself not to react when the door opened. Normal people didn't have reflexes and instinct, or if they did, they didn't act on 'em. Threat assessment wasn't civilian behaviour.

It was Jacob coming back in from the garage, wiping dirty hands on a rag. "I have bad news. You're going to need to wait for some parts to be sourced."

Ellie frowned. "Oh. Well, how much are they gonna be?"

"I'll let you know. Shouldn't be too much, I'm not getting anything new. Couple hundred maybe."

The kettle whistled and Jacob switched the gas off as he went past, going into the next room.

"You want some coffee?" Abby asked, already up and preparing cups.

"Sure. Thanks." Ellie started slouching, then realised that would reveal the outline of her gun and sat up straight.

"Abby? Honey?" Jacob called from somewhere in the house. "Could you come here a minute?"

"Hold on, Jake!" She was loud for a little thing. Abby rolled her eyes conspiratorially at Ellie. "I'll be right back. Sugar's just on the counter there, and milk's in the fridge. Sorry to be an awful host, but he pouts like a toddler when he can't find something."

"That's perfectly fine," Ellie said, rising carefully and going to the fridge as Abby sailed away gracefully. She located the milk and froze for a second when she heard a floorboard creak under someone's foot.

_Normal, _she reminded herself. _If that fails, you still have a gun. _

She closed the door and feigned surprise at Jacob's reappearance by the door.

"Oh! You're kinda big to be sneaking 'round like that," she said a little breathlessly, hand to her chest. "Did you want some coffee?"

"I'd like to know why you have a gun in my house," he said casually, leaning against the doorframe.

Damn. He must have seen the outline. Points to him for getting his girl outta the way, though. Jacob Black had protective instincts and used them. She respected that.

She shrugged. "Don't worry, I wasn't gonna use it on you and your girl. It's for monsters. I just didn't think it'd be polite to leave it lyin' around."

"You run into a lot of those on your trip?"

Ellie didn't have to fake the face she pulled. "You'd be surprised." Although she doubted they were talking about the same kind of monsters. She could deal with sleazy truckstop douchebags without pulling the gun.

He held out his hand. "Give it here. I'll put it in my truck, and when I drop you home you can get it back."

Her eyes narrowed. "I don't like being defenceless."

"I don't like you having a gun in my house. You're not in danger here."

They were at stalemate for a moment until Abby could be heard coming back down the passage, saying something about _it was in the third drawer, Jake, like it always is, you're so blind. _Ellie sighed, knowing she was defeated, and pulled out the gun to hand it over.

"Don't you do anything to it," she warned quietly. "Me and this gun've been through some things."

"Wouldn't dream of it," he assured her cheerfully. "Be right back, Abby!"

Abby appeared in the doorway to frown at her boyfriend's back as he strode away again. "Honestly, I think I'm dating a five year old. He has no attention span at all."

Ellie settled back into the chair with her cup. "He seems real nice. How long you been together?"

"Three years," Abby said happily. "I used to go to summer camp with a girl who lived here, and I came to visit her a lot once we got too old for that. Me and Jake just clicked, so after school I moved here to be with him."

"Well, it seems pretty nice here." Ellie said. "Peaceful. Anything much ever happen?"

Abby seemed to freeze slightly, but then she laughed and the moment was over. "No, not really. It's really slow most of the time. I think the most exciting thing was when Letty set her house on fire."

"Who?"

"Letty Peterson," Abby said, shaking her head slightly at whatever antics this Letty had got up to. "She's this old lady. She lives, like, two streets over from the grocery store. Big old white one with green shutters? She went kind of crazy a few weeks ago, said her husband was back, and then she lit her house on fire. Swears she didn't do it, of course, but there's no one else there. Her husband died and her kids are all out of state. Everyone kind of hushed it up so she wouldn't have to go to a home. She's a really nice lady."

"So she thinks her dead husband did it?"

"Yeah." Abby rolled her eyes. "Crazy, huh?"

"Insane," Ellie agreed.

Of _course _a job had found her here. Of _course _it would.

She kinda hoped the old bat was just crazy.

*.*.*

**Usually the back seat of the Impala,**

**Or in crummy diners/motels.**

**2007**

Turns out her momma was prepared for things to head south at some point in her life. She'd known all along that monsters under the bed were real.

"Hold up," Ellie interrupted. "You're sayin' that those _things _that came after me… there's more of 'em? And there's other things that are worse?"

"Pretty much," Sam said. "Just be open to the possibility that every mythical creature in every culture exists, and then you won't be taken by surprise."

She gaped at him over the table of the cheap diner they had stopped at.

"How the hell did my mom get involved in this?" she demanded.

"Apparently she was involved in a job Dad did. Werewolf in Leesville." Sam poured dressing over his salad. "We don't know how she was involved exactly, but he helped her out, and I guess…" he trailed off with a shrug.

Ellie wrinkled her nose. "Right."

"It could have been someone else," Dean grumbled around his cheeseburger.

Sam sighed. "Yes, Dean, it could have been anyone else and we would never know. We only have the birth certificate, the location in Dad's journal, and photos of Dad and Ellie to prove it. Really inconclusive."

"How did you get my birth certificate?"

Sam turned back to her. "Your mom's lawyer sent a package to Bobby after she died. I guess it took a while to get it sorted with the will and all, he only got it a little while back. It had your birth certificate, passport, pictures, bank information. Letters from your mom." He took a bite and chewed it while she took that in, then started talking again. "She wrote one to him, telling him all about you. And there's one she wrote for you waiting at his house."

Ellie felt like her head was pounding with all the stuff her newfound family had dumped on her. "Wait, who's this Bobby person?"

"Bobby's our friend. The one we're taking you to. He's a hunter, like us."

She frowned. "So why am I gonna be safer with him than you if y'all have the same job?"

"It's not up for debate," Dean said, speaking up for the first time since he'd sat down with his cheeseburger and a scowl. "You're going to Bobby's. You'll just get in our way."

Ellie took aim, mindful of Sam, and kicked Dean under the table. Hard. He yelped and shot a wounded look at her.

"Stop messin' with me," she hissed. "I'd like to see you take all this in with one gulp. I didn't ask for _none_ of this. I'm the oopsie baby, remember?"

He glowered at her.

Sam diplomatically took charge again. "You'll like it with Bobby. He doesn't move around all the time like we do, so you'd have more of a home base while we figure out your next move."

They ate in silence for a while.

"Sam?" Ellie said quietly.

"Yeah?"  
>"How did they think she died? The normal people?"<p>

Sam swallowed uncomfortably. "Uh, general opinion is that she was murdered and brutalised by a coworker. The shifters stole his identity for a while."

"What happened to him?"

Now he looked really uncomfortable. "Well…"

"Suicide," Dean said around his burger. He sounded morbidly cheerful. She hoped it was because of the cheeseburger. "He thought he was going crazy, seeing three of himself committing crimes. Thought he actually did it. Swallowed a round before the cops got to him. I tell ya, these shifters were sloppy, leaving a loose end like that."

She closed her eyes for a moment, praying this was all some twisted and disturbingly detailed dream.

When she opened them, the diner was still there, and Dean was giving her the damn stink eye again while Sam dug into his Caesar salad.

*.*.*

It was a long way to Bobby's house apparently, especially driving everywhere like these boys did. It seemed like everywhere they stopped, something unnatural was happening. Sam and Dean usually made her stay at the motel or in the car, though she was pretty sure it was for different reasons. Sam seemed concerned that she'd end up bait. Dean just wanted her to be useless so he could offload her.

She learned a lot, those early days on the road. It felt like her whole life she'd been wearing blinders and now someone had taken them off. The road ahead wasn't the only thing she saw now. She saw the woods on either side, and the sinister things that muddled within.

She learned that no matter how much Sam ribbed him about it, Dean would play the same songs from an era she wasn't even sure he was alive for. Old rock. Classic, and usually timeless, but after listening to the same tapes (and who even _had _tapes anymore?) for hours and hours and hours, it was getting pretty old. And if either of them complained, Dean just turned it up and looked at them like he was daring them to do something about it.

No one messed with Baby. Not even if it was just with her stereo.

She missed Mom. She hadn't had much time to think about it before now because she'd been on the run and trying to survive. She woulda liked to have gone to the funeral. Or known anything about it.

She wondered what flowers they'd picked. Who'd gone.

She'd never been to Sioux Falls, or anywhere else in South Dakota. She'd never actually been outta Louisiana before now. Most days she just watched the scenery go by, talked to Sam if he was in a talking mood, and tried not to get in Dean's way. She felt like he was warming up to her. He'd actually had a conversation with her last time they stopped before he realised that he was meant to be holding some stupid grudge against her existence.

It came to a bit of a head shortly after a week of travelling around like this. They were in a dumb motel again. Ellie swore the motels all look exactly the same. She was looking forward to getting to Bobby's just for a bit of something _new_.

Except she didn't want to go stay at Bobby's, not really.

"Why won't ya teach me?" she complained, glaring at Sam and Dean as they went over their arsenal, a habit she'd almost grown used to. "I gotta learn sometime if I'm in this kinda life now."

"You're not in it," Dean said shortly. "You haven't grown up with it, you don't know what you're doing. You'll just get yourself killed."

"You don't _want _to grow up with it," Sam added, eyes on his task as he grimaced. "Trust me. It sucks."

"I can't just go back to normal. It don't _work _like that." She crossed her arms and resisted the urge to stamp her foot like a kid. "I can fight. I know how. You just gotta teach me the other stuff."

"_You_ can fight," Dean scoffed, looking her up and down. "You're a freaking kid. What are you gonna fight off?"

"I could fight you," she retorted.

He rolled his eyes, and to her dismay, even Sam looked a little amused.

"Sure you could, sweetheart," Dean said.

"I'm serious," Ellie insisted. "Get up. I bet I can defend myself."

He looked at her for a minute, then got up, shaking his head. "What, you take some self defence courses at the rec centre where you grew up?"

"Something like that."

"Dean," Sam said exasperatedly. "Ellie. Come on, knock it off. This is stupid."

Ellie raised an eyebrow at Dean. "Go on, then. Attack. If I win, I get to hunt."

"Fine." He held up his hands, seemingly relaxed, then _lunged. _Ellie sidestepped his attempt and let instinct take over, grabbing him and using his own momentum to send him hurtling to the ground.

She stepped back and beckoned him again, not daring to be smug in case it was a fluke. She hadn't practised in a good while, unless actual tussling with the druggies counted. It didn't. Their form was always terrible.

But she had just landed him face first on the ground. And it did feel kinda good that Sam was trying to smother a laugh.

"Lucky move," Dean grumbled, getting back to his feet. He approached her again, warier this time. He moved -

And she ducked under his hit and got him in the stomach. His body slackened momentarily under the impact and she retreated a step, used the opportunity snap her leg up and against the side of his head. He staggered with a curse and she pivoted to kick him again, more solidly, on his chest. Off balance he staggered backwards and crashed into a uselessly small decorative coffee table, landing this time on his ass.

He looked up with his eyes narrowed.

Sam was laughing all out by now. "Dude, you got your ass handed to you by a chick. She's _sixteen." _

He moved suddenly, sweeping her feet out from under her. Ellie yelped and twisted as she went down, driving her elbow into his belly with her full weight. He grunted but latched onto her, pinning her arms awkwardly. She wriggled and reared her head back, smashing her forehead into what would have been his nose had he not turned at the last second.

She had to get out of his hold before he could overpower her with his strength.

_ThinkthinkTHINK._

She still had her feet.

She went limp for a beat, then bucked and twisted. His arms had loosened just a fraction and it was enough to get her own arms out and put them to use getting out of his hold. He yelped when she reached up and twisted his ear around, letting go of her completely to grab at it. Ellie scrambled up and turned-

Dean was pointing a gun at her.

"Bang," he said, chest heaving from the exertion. "You're dead."

"That's cheating."

He rose carefully, keeping it trained on her. "You think what's out there's gonna play fair with you? Stick to, what, tournament rules? No. So _bang. _You're dead."

"Dean," Sam said, ever the pacifist. "Put the gun down, man, she gets it."

Dean held it up for a moment longer, holding eye contact to see if she did get it, then lowered the gun and tucked it under his jacket again.

"If you gave me a gun, I'd have the same advantage," Ellie said. She could shoot. John had taken her to the firing range once for her birthday, and living in derelict apartments for a year had taught her everything else she needed to know about the heavy weight of a gun in her hand. Even if she'd only really used it for show, except when the thing that killed her mother was after her. Her brothers hadn't seen fit to replace the one the skinwalkers confiscated.

Dean snorted. "Princess, you ain't getting a gun. You don't know how to use one."

"I know how to shoot," she argued. "Dad taught me!"

"You said Dad last visited when you were thirteen," Sam pointed out, can of beer in hand as he watched his siblings over the screen of his laptop. "You've probably forgotten whatever he taught you by now."

"I haven't."

"Prove it," Dean challenged.

"Give me a damn gun and I will."

Dean and Ellie stared at each other for a long moment, both stubbornly refusing to look away. She imagined she could almost see the seam where their wills were clashing, somewhere down the middle of the room.

"Come on," he growled suddenly, apparently coming to a decision. He grabbed his keys off the table and headed out the door. Sam sighed and stood up, gesturing for her to follow as he headed out too.


End file.
